Bobbi Brown: Matriarch

STJ has interviewed titans of industry; world-class athletes; and creative juggernauts—all around the concept of motherhood and its “stickier” bits. 

We're pleased to share that we are expanding to a new series. We are interviewing, profiling, and photographing women—mothers, grandmothers, aunties who chose not to have kids—with more lived experience and tested wisdom. 

As a rule, STJ has avoided doling out advice on how to mother in 2026. And yet at a time when there's so much noise and uncertainty, our community craves learning from those with long pasts and well-honed perspectives. Welcome to Matriarch.

It’s easy to toss around the word “icon.” To call someone a “legend.” But find me someone who actually impacted women’s lives on a molecular basis with her vision, creativity, and sheer longevity. Someone dedicated to making working moms (and teenagers and grandmas and single ladies and stay-at-home mamas and empty nesters) feel prettier while still—and this is really important to her—looking like themselves. 

It’s Bobbi Brown who revolutionized (hyperbole warranted) the makeup industry first for decades with her eponymous brand and now with Jones Road: the simple, well-made products we didn’t know we needed, even with the market as saturated as it is. 

Bobbi is also a mother of three boys—or rather, men: ages 28, 32, and 34, and a grandmother as well. She also recently authored Still Bobbi: A Master Class in Resilience and Reinvention, which we devoured in the Spread The Jelly office sharing where we underlined, starred, and check-marked because the honesty, wisdom, and straight-up rules for life were so damn good. Because that’s the thing about Bobbi, whether it’s about makeup or parenting, Bobbi will never ever gatekeep good advice. 

When the kids were at home, Bobbi lived something of a double-life: jetting around the world launching her company, which was eventually acquired by Estee Lauder; driving into the city to work Vogue shoots and attend the Met Gala; and living in her beloved Montclair, New Jersey: a perfectly normal suburb. The boys went to public school; they ate dinner together as a family every night; and Bobbi, a class mom, didn’t miss a sports game. 

How’d she do it? Well, she’s here to give you some really practical tips: buy a rotisserie chicken and dismantle it every Sunday night; hire a “manny”; hell, hire a support network of all genders if you can; add all school events to the calendar immediately; don’t stress about co-sleeping; and above all, just be yourself and purse your own comfort whatever that means to you. 

Words by Emily Barasch, Images provided by Bobbi Brown.

Menschy stability >>> 

My parents were really great parents, but they were 20 and 21 when we were born. By the time my dad was 25, he had three kids and lived in the suburbs. My parents were glamorous and fantastic. My mother was really a caring, creative mom. There were definitely some angsty things which I wrote about in the book. My parents got divorced and they literally on the drop of a dime would fly to some junket in Las Vegas or wherever. They would travel all the time and leave us with whomever. 

When I met my husband, my husband's family was just mensches. They were normal. They were wonderful. And I just was like: I want to be like that. I want a more stable family life. I wanted more stability in my life. I gave it to my kids.

“I knew how to fucking figure everything out.”

The whole secret of the universe is your village of support. At the beginning of motherhood, I was very naive and had no clue what I'm doing, but I was really scrappy and I knew how to fucking figure everything out. The reason I even thought of starting with a make-up line, creating a lipstick, was because I didn't want to travel anymore for Vogue. 

I lived in the suburbs with this new baby. My husband went to law school because the real estate market crashed. I didn't have big support in the beginning. I did eventually have a nanny every day. But as the kids got older, I always tried different things. One of my best nannies was actually a manny. He was going to school to get his degree at night and he took care of the kids during the day. He would play with the three boys in the backyard. He would take them to sports practice. I think he was even once the coach of the youngest’s baseball team. 

Beauty legend and class mom 

My kids definitely saw the world and traveled with us. But I think they had a pretty normal upbringing compared to some other kids who are privileged. My kids always went to public school. I was the class mom for at least one of them and I was at every game. I was the snack mom and my husband was the coach. We'd go out for pizza with everyone. We just chose a normal life, which I think is the best thing for raising our kids. 

Bobbi’s life hacks 101

I became an entrepreneur of my life. I figured out hacks to get things to work. Sunday night I would go buy a cooked organic chicken and take it apart, put it in a glass container. I would make pasta and drain it, put it in a container, and make all the vegetables because when I got home from work, I didn't have a chef. I had to make dinner for everyone. 

I was never the mom that was really good with homework help. When the kids got older, I had another afterschool babysitter who was one of their teachers. She helped with the homework, so I didn't have to help them with their math or whatever it was, but I made sure there was dinner on the table. 

I realized early on: Oh my god, I'm spending so much time going to buy birthday presents for all these parties. I finally just went to the local bookstore and I said, "All right, give me $10 gift certificates so that I could put them in an envelope." That was my gift to the kids. They got to go back to the bookstore. I figured out how to get things done. 

When they could, my kids would come with me to a movie premiere. I brought all the kids when I got invited, I'm like, "Can I bring my family?" It was known I wanted my family to come.

How she actually got it done 

I made these rules like: I don't work on Valentine's Day, my husband's birthday, and our anniversary. My kids' school vacations were on my calendar. So when I made my very big plans to travel the globe, I wouldn't make the mistake and be away when my kids have the spring dance or whatever was important at the time. I put them on the calendar and people supported me and no one ever yelled at me at work. 

I started to work from home on Fridays and then I added Wednesdays. So I would go to the office and work really hard Monday and Tuesday, be home on Wednesday so I could drop my kid at school and then I would be on the phone all day. I'd pick them up after school and then I always gave them to someone to go play. I was not a playing mom. I play much more with my grandkids than I ever did with my kids. 

My husband, who's very accomplished, was always home for dinner every single night. We had dinner as a family every single night unless there was a sports event. I just didn't need to network to be fabulous. I learned early on that, yes, I'd do fashion week and there'd be after parties and I'm like: I'd much rather be home in my pajamas, sit on the couch, and be with my kids than get all dressed up and be fabulous because it wasn't my comfort. My comfort is always to be normal. 

We didn't have the Internet. I mean, my kids cried. I tried sleep training, but my oldest threw up so much I just put him in my bed because I had to get up early in the morning and go on the Today Show. My oldest son slept in my bed until he didn't. Sometimes my husband said he didn't know where anyone was because he would sleep through the night and there'd be kids and his wife in different beds. But we somehow just figured it out and didn't feel bad because there wasn't an Instagram.

Wardrobe maintenance, according to Bobbi 

I try to simplify. I try to be a simple person. I organize my closet, try everything on, make sure it all fits. Everything's navy, white, and black, so it's easy. I'm so curious. I buy new jeans and new sweaters, and all of a sudden, I got too much stuff. What do I do about it? I get an LL Bean bag and I embroider with the words: “Give.” I put them in this bag and then I nicely donate this bag to whoever is near me and is in need of things. I try to find solutions. I'm not going to stop buying things on Instagram because I'm curious and it's so easy. All you have to do is press a button. 

When (actual) authenticity becomes your (literal) brand

I always had my kids be part of my work. I was doing Vogue when everything was fabulous and nobody would talk about god forbid if you had a child, let alone lived in the suburbs. God forbid you would not get hired again because people were not doing that, but I did. I started my company based on being a busy working mom: I'm overwhelmed. This is how I do my makeup in the car. These are the four things I have in my bag. 

And yes, I go to the Met Gala. I have done people's makeup for the Met Gala and then changed in a bathroom to get ready. I'm just that person. 

Ed note: Can we also join Bobbi’s posse? 

Motherhood was the best best best best best thing in the entire universe. Looking at everything I've accomplished my whole life being a mother was by far just outweighed everything. 

My family is my posse. They're my posse. Two of them are married. One of them has two kids, so I am now a grandma. It's so funny to see me at Jones Road shoots with [my grand-daughter] Lily in my arms, doing makeup. And I'm like: I used to do this with your father. It's just so funny.

“I never felt that I was put together enough and fancy enough”

The worst part of motherhood in my thirties is I would be literally getting on airplanes, packing so I could look presentable at Neiman Marcus in Dallas or Bal Harbor, and I'd have my kids with me and I'd have my husband because he always loved to travel. So he would watch the kids while I was at these events and he'd be coming in when I told him I'd be done and these kids would be running all over. Or maybe the night before I was up because they had chickenpox. That was hard you know and I never felt that I was put together enough and fancy enough.

I just never felt that I was glamorous enough to be doing this until I realized my style is my style and there's nothing wrong with it. This was before people started showing up with messy buns, everybody still looked perfect, you know. Now I got chipped nails and guess what? It's okay.

What’s hardest now?

The most challenging part of motherhood [at my stage] is definitely making sure everyone gets along because there are plenty of times where they don't. That's probably the hardest part. You're only as happy as your least happy child and it's true at any given time, there's some angst somewhere. I just don't like it. I'm a fixer. Tell me what's wrong, I'll fix you. Here's a piece of candy.

But you can't always do that. My oldest kid is 36 and then I have a 34 year old and a 28-year-old. One of them is just the easiest thing in the whole universe. The other ones have their things, whether they're struggling with me or I annoy them. I mean, I don't try to annoy my children. I just can't help it.

Reinvention in her sixth decade 

I just didn't feel done. I felt that I had something different to teach, show, and create. Especially without handcuffs because when you're part of a very big corporate organization, everything was a fight especially at the end. 

I did not expect Jones Road to blow up like this. I just wanted to do it. I love what I'm doing. I love all the people I've met. I've love all the people in their thirties. I'm always going to all these founder things. It's my mentoring self which is just being a teaching mother to empower people around me. 

On being a lifelong student

There is nothing normal and traditional about me. I used to feel bad about it. Now I realize that's my superpower. I don't check my text or my emails to make sure I spelled everything right.

I had a nine-year-old when I turned 50. (I had my last baby at 41.) My friends were like: You're having a baby? I used to walk into dinner in the suburbs with my friends and I felt like I had a Birkin bag. I'd walk in, but it was a car seat that I had the baby in, and I'd put him on the table. I never had to ask if I could bring him because they just knew I'm not going out unless I bring this baby. They all held him and I just realized: I figured out how to be unapologetically myself. 

Repeat after Bobbi: We don’t want to look like shit 

[My beauty philosophy is] we don't want to look like shit. We just want to look a little put together and prettier. For me, the most important thing I do all week is get a blowout because otherwise I sit with my hair in a ponytail. People kind of expect me to be the least dressed and the messiest in the room. Some people think I dress so cool and other people always think I'm a schlub, but it's my style. 

Fitness goal is to play with grandkids 

I exercise easily five days a week and the other days I don't. I spend some time stretching or, you know, or walking. I do a lot of walking, but I do them. I would tell everyone out there: Get a weight routine. I don't care how old you are.

It's not about being skinny. It's about being strong. For women of a certain age, it's about strength and conditioning. Throw the balls up in the air, you bend down, you pick it up, and it really does mimic life. So, when my grandkids are here, and when they yell BB— my grandma name is BB—I pick them up like 35,000 times whenever they call.

My daughter-in-law comes with the kids and there's no babysitter. I love every second of it. It's exhausting, but I make sure my body is conditioned. You have to think of yourself as an athlete for your life. I'm not an athlete, but I need to be an athlete for my life. But it's so much fun. I have the most delicious grandchildren.

What’s next

I'm going to be turning 70 next year and I am going to create magic in my seventies and I plan to do it in my eighties. I don't quite have a vision for 90 yet you know but I'm like fuck it's not that far away. All of a sudden.